Do you accept yourself, just the way you are? Not just all
the things that are great about you, but also the parts that you might think
are not so great about you?
Self-acceptance means that we are willing to acknowledge
that we think what we think, feel what we feel, desire what we desire, have
done what we have done, and are what we are.
Take a moment and think about all the things you already
accept and love about yourself. And then take a moment and write down some
things that are harder to accept about yourself.
Here is a key distinction: “Accepting” does not necessarily
mean that you have to “like”, “enjoy” or “condone” something. It doesn’t mean
that you cannot wish for a change or an improvement. It just means that you can
say: “This is an expression of me, not necessarily an expression I like or
admire, but still an expression of me, at least at the time it occurred.”
And by accepting that part of ourselves, it now frees us up
to change, if we so choose. There are definitely some things that are harder to
accept about myself. I procrastinate, I find it hard to focus on one thing, and
I can be indecisive. If I am not willing to accept these traits, then I cannot
do anything about them, since I am not even willing to acknowledge that they
are a fact. Once I am able to accept them, I have a choice. I can embrace them
or work on changing them, if I want.
What if there is an emotion, behavior, or thought that you
are simply unwilling to accept? Start by accepting your resistance to accept
it. And if you cannot accept your resistance, accept your resistance to accept
your resistance. =)
Be compassionate with yourself through this process. We all
have things we like and don’t like about ourselves. If we judge ourselves, then
we are not accepting who we are.
What would happen if you were more accepting of your “supposed”
flaws?
What would happen if you were more accepting of your
greatness?
This is the 2nd Pillar from Dr. Nathaniel Branden’s
book “The 6 Pillars of Self-Esteem.” For more on self-acceptance when it feels
impossible, see: http://www.esteemedself.com/when-self-acceptance-feels-impossible/
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