Keep Asking Until You Find the Answers

 

"Some people fold after making one timid request. They quit too soon. Keep asking until you find the answers."

~Jack Canfield

Why is it sometimes so hard to ask for what we want? It could be because we don't want to appear selfish, or maybe we don't want to rock the boat or we are afraid to be told 'no' and feel rejected.

So when we finally get up our courage and ask for something that is important to us and we hear the dreaded "no," we often stop right there. After all, who wants to get rejected over and over again?

But did you know that in sales, there are usually four or five "no's" before a "yes?" I was amazed when I found out that was the case. And I started to think about what that meant if we applied it to our life. 

What if it was proof that rejection is not something to take personally, but just the natural order of life? What if we knew and expected that there will always be "no's" when we try to pursue something that we want, but that didn't mean that we won't be able to achieve it?

 

Think of something you really want to have in your life. Maybe it's the career of your dreams, a Soulmate, more balance and less stress in your life or something else. Would it be worthwhile to go out and go for it (and risk hearing some "no's") before you give up on it? 

Manuela teaches women life strategies to find success in their careers and personal lives! You can visit Manuela's Website for Personal Success Coaching and Empowerment Workshops. 

   

The Courageous Step

At the end of last year, I chose “Courageous” as my quality that I want more of for 2013 (See: The World Hasn’t Ended, NowWhat?) So I was drawn to the following writing by David Whyte. 



 “The Courageous Step
Why is it so difficult to take the first, necessary, close-in, courageous step to claiming our happiness in life? Perhaps, because taking that step immediately leads to a kind of radical internal simplification, where, suddenly, large parts of us, parts of us that had been kept gainfully employed for years; parts of us we thought absolutely necessary to the story, are suddenly out of a job. There occurs in effect a massive form of internal corporate downsizing, where the naysayers in us that do not wish to participate are let go, with all of the accompanying death-like trauma, and where the last fight occurs, a rear guard disbelief that this new, less complicated self, is equal to the new possibilities ahead. –It is always hard to believe that the courageous step is so close to us, that it is closer in than we could imagine, that in fact, we already know what it is, and that that step is simpler, more radical than we had thought: which is why we so often prefer the story to be more complicated, our identities equally clouded by fear and the answer safely in the realm of impossibility.” ~David Whyte
 

I love his question “Why is it so difficult to take the first, necessary, close-in, courageous step to claiming our happiness in life?” Because it is so true. Sometimes we know exactly that we need to take a step to make the change we want. But that step seems oh so hard.

The conclusion is right on, too: “We so often prefer the story to be more complicated, our identities equally clouded by fear and the answer safely in the realm of impossibility.”

When I really dig down deep and ask myself why I am making things more complicated than they need to be, I find that the answer is ultimately: fear.

It feels safer to believe that what we want isn’t really possible or it is too difficult. That way we don’t have to risk failure or disappointment.

Yet what do we give up by not taking that courageous step? If the answer is “happiness”, is that a price you are willing to pay?

You can visit Manuela's Website for Professional Life Coaching and Personal Growth Workshops.